Mitch Hedberg "I don't own a cell phone or a pager. I just hang around everyone I know, all the time. If someone wants to get a hold of me, they just say 'Mitch,' and I say 'what?' and turn my head slightly."
Daniel Webster "The world is governed more by appearances than realities, so that it is fully as necessary to seem to know something as to know it."
Christopher Hampton "Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs."
Wilson Mizner "To my embarrassment I was born in bed with a lady."
Kevin Rose "I don't care what it is, when it has an LCD screen, it makes it better."
George C. Marshall "If man does find the solution for world peace it will be the most revolutionary reversal of his record we have ever known."
Oscar Wilde "One is tempted to define man as a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason."
Thomas Sowell "There are only two ways of telling the complete truth--anonymously and posthumously."
R. Stevens "Ever heard Victoria's REAL secret? Too much support hurts."
Albert Schweitzer "Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile."
Quote of the Day… 8/28/08 Biden on Meet the Press in 2002, discussing Saddam Hussein: “He’s a long term threat and a short term threat to our national security… “We have no choice but to eliminate the threat. This is a guy who is an extreme danger to the world.” - Joe Biden
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